Faith is why I choose to believe. In Ether 12:6 it reads, “And now, I, Moroni, would speak somewhat concerning these things; I would show unto the world that faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for you receive no witness until after the trial of your faith.”
Trials come to all of us in this lifetime. Some may seem more serious than others. Some may affect us and try us more than others, but we will all have trials. Through the trials in my life I have learned great lessons. One of the lessons learned is, “how strong is my testimony?” Is my testimony strong enough so that I can gain a witness of the truthfulness of the things I claim to believe in?
Believing came easy for me most of my life and I feel blessed for that. I was blessed with goodly parents who were not active in the church most of my life, but were very supportive of the decisions that my siblings and I made to be active. I was blessed with a wonderful eternal companion with whom I have gone through trials, from infertility, adoptions, job loss, loss of parents, etc.
On June 10, 2016 was a day that we will never forget. We had all been in Idaho to a family party and our youngest daughter needed to come back to Utah for work the next day. On her way back to Utah she was involved in a one car rollover that took her life.
Through the weeks that followed I felt the love of my Father in Heaven and his son Jesus Christ in my life unlike any other time. But as time stretched on, I started to struggle. As hard as I tried to push back the “why” had this happened, it started to creep in. I remember one day in particular I had to stop and find a quiet place and have a talk with myself. Did I truly believe what I thought I did? Through weeks of soul searching, reading, praying and wrestling with my spirit, the doubts started to lift and a sweetness returned to my soul and I knew that what I had believed all my life was right. It was the way back to live with my Father in Heaven and his son Jesus Christ again. It was the means by which we would see our daughter and my parents again and have the chance to be with them and others for eternity.
I choose to believe because my faith brings me peace and brings me answers and I am forever grateful for that.