Christ has Given "Beauty for Ashes" in My Life

I was recently thinking about what I was doing a year ago at this time. The kids were all in school. I was trying my hand at some home canning and thinking about Halloween decorations. Fast forward a year and canning is about the only thing that is familiar. We’re now a good six months or so into a once in a hundred year pandemic and it has put its mark on just about everything- church, work, school, and social lives. Meanwhile, our country is in an extremely divided time politically. There is civil unrest and protests around the nation as we try to work out our issues with race. There are wildfires that are consuming large swaths of the West. Even locally, there are contentions about school schedules, and wearing masks, etc. IT CAN BE A LOT.

When it is A LOT, I have learned to turn to my Heavenly Father in prayer and to turn to my Savior for comfort, counsel and example. I “CHOOSE to believe” in them because I have tested Christ’s gospel in my life and it works. I have trust in Jesus Christ because when I have put his counsel to the test, it has born out to be true. He has helped me through the darkness. He has helped me to grow and become stronger.

You see, as rough as this year has been it is not my hardest. My most difficult year was a few years back. I faced some challenges that absolutely shattered me. Every part of me and my life. It was so difficult that it even made me question my idea of who God must be. I couldn’t see how God could be a “loving Father” and have this happen. Why would He allow it?

There is a painting called “Hope” by George Fredric Watts (see photos) When I saw this painting, I could identify immediately with the woman in this painting. I felt blinded and struggling. I was down to my last string straining to hear any sound that might still be there to get me through.

That string was Jesus Christ. It was his life, his example and his teachings that saw me through. I held on and listened to that string for dear life and he did not let me down. Little by little he helped me to find my way. He was sure and unchanging. His teachings were true.

In Japan, there is an art form called Kintsugi, (see photos) where an artist will take a broken piece of pottery and glue it back together. Next they will take gold and place it in the repaired seams highlighting them and making it into something new. When this is done well, it can make them worth more than they were before. This is what Christ did for that shattered me. He put me back together and used my scars to make me into something new. Something better than I was before.

This is what Christ always does. No matter what hard thing you face, He can get you through. No matter what garbage you are given in life, He can make it into something of value and beauty. This is Christ. This is what He does. He gives us “beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness.” (Isaiah 61:3). All we have to do is turn to Him. As that old young women’s song says, “Learn of [Him] and listen to [His] words. Walk in the meekness of [His] light and [He] will give you peace.”

So, when you find yourself down to your last string, listen closely to Christ. He will not fail you. Let Him work in your life. And then, when you find your song again, follow His example by making beauty out of the ugliness around you. Each of us will do this differently but we all can all do it. Ask yourself: What can I do? Can I build? Can I repair? Can I strengthen? Can I teach? Can I care for? Can I forgive? Can I protect? Can I create? It is within each of us to do something like Christ to make our current situations better and more lovely. I hope we can all follow His example. I send my love to you all.

~ Jamie

I Choose to Believe in the Power of Christ's Atonement

Women's Conference Talk by Miriam Franson

I sat at a lunch recently with some dear friends who shared their discouragement with their college-age daughters’ struggles to find men to date who do not or have not had issues with pornography. They just don't want their daughters to have to deal with that! I am sure we all can relate to deep feelings of concern for how battles with addiction today affect not only now, but the marriages and families of our children and grandchildren.

As I sat at that lunch and in other circumstances where the question, “Can people really change? Truly overcome and begin new?” is wrestled with, I’ve wished I knew how to share my own depth of belief in the power of the Savior’s Atonement to do just that. I’ve felt His power help me move past things in my own life, and have seen it transform the lives of people I dearly love.

I have come to believe that there are many more hopeful stories than we realize sitting all around us, but out of loyalty, self-preservation, and a desire not to have it be the headline of life moving forward, we don’t hear them.

When a single friend of mine moved here from out of state, I asked her if there was anything tough for her about the move to Utah. She said, “I don’t know if people here really believe that the Atonement works. They talk about it, but do they really believe that it can change lives?”

The Road Back Was Long and Difficult--But Worth It

Name Withheld
This story has never been shared before, but I hope that someday others may learn from my trials and mistakes.

In my junior year of high school, despite my better judgment, I began dating a boy who I knew had lower standards than what I had been taught and practiced as a member of the Church. I was just excited that someone had finally taken interest in me and made me feel special, comfortable and loved.

Although I did not realize it at the time, I was slowly being led down a slippery slope, and before I knew it, I had allowed what is considered most precious and sacred to be taken from me.  I felt numb and overwhelmed, and my mind flashed back to stories I had heard in Young Women regarding young ladies who lost their virtue and were seemingly no longer wanted or of good worth.

I convinced myself that this was the man that I was meant to be with.  I knew that if we could be married that in some way it would make what had happened all right. The relationship wasn’t perfect, but he had me, and he knew it.  He grew to become emotionally abusive.  I was kept under close watch and not allowed to do things on my own or with friends.  After some time I had no friends left and it was just the two of us.

I convinced myself that we were in love and our relationship was normal. In my mind, because of sins that were committed, leaving him was not an option.  I began to lose myself and do other things that I knew weren't right, since in my mind I had already committed a sin “second only to murder.”  I began to distance myself from the Church and anything that reminded me that I was doing things I was not supposed to.  I had no idea how wrong the way I was living was.

Addiction, Forgiveness, and the Atonement

Name Withheld
When my husband and I were dating, he decided he had to tell me about his addiction to pornography. He was clearly embarrassed and repentant, and had been "sober" for some time. I was surprised but felt honored that he trusted me with this secret. If anything, I loved him more after that. This was a battle we were going to fight together. It was his past and we'd have to fight it, but we'd be fine. I wasn't so naive to think that it wouldn't cause strain in our relationship, but I didn't anticipate the heartache, anger, self doubt, and betrayal.

From MormonWoman.org

His sobriety lasted through our dating, engagement, and first three months or so of marriage. When he then admitted he had viewed pornography, I was felt so stupid. How did I not know what was happening in my own home? Was I not enough? I plunged into feelings of worthlessness.

I remember thinking, "He's such a good man. How can he do such a disgusting thing? He loves me. How can he do something so hurtful? Does he really love me?" I felt very alone. I respected the fact this was his secret to keep or share, but that left me with nobody to talk to. I was so hurt that I used anger to cope with the sorrow.

All of those feelings were mixed up with gratitude that he came to me with the truth and that he knew he was wrong. I was heartbroken that right when I needed comfort the most, I couldn't ask the man who stood at my side for a blessing of comfort. He was not worthy to use the Lord's priesthood. He knew it, and I could see how ashamed and sorrowful he was.

Lessons from a Cracked Tile

by Shay Tucker
My husband, Daren, and I have recently been experiencing the stresses that come from building our first home. It has been a learning experience that has taught us temporal and eternal lessons. I thought I would share one particular lesson we learned together. Rather than share my own words, I thought it best to share my husband’s journal entry.

The other day I was installing the backsplash at our new home. Shay came to see how it was going and noticed that one of the small marble tiles was cracked. I had already attached it to the wall but had not yet grouted. She wanted me to replace it. I argued with her that it looked like a seam in the stone and we didn't need to worry about it. No one would ever notice it but her. She said it would bother her for the rest of her life and would rather change it now while it is easy to fix.

For a while I stubbornly refused to change it but eventually lost the battle. I popped the tile off and replaced it in about three minutes with a brand new piece. Since the mortar was still wet behind the tile and I hadn't grouted yet, it was not very difficult to change. Had I refused to change it and finished grouting, fixing it later would have been much more difficult. It likely would have caused the other tiles around it to become loose as well, requiring them to be replaced also.

On the way home, I realized that Shay had taught me an eternal principle about repentance. I turned to her and related the enlightenment I had just received. We make mistakes in our lives, and sometimes we think we can hide them from others. But the truth is that we, as well as the Lord, will always know about these mistakes.

If we do not correct the mistake right away, it may become hardened and "grouted" into our lives. At that point it becomes very difficult to fix the mistake. If we fail to correct our mistakes, it can lead to other mistakes, which can affect others around us. "Now is the time for us to prepare to meet God."

I related this experience during my testimony on Sunday. Shay just sat and smiled, enjoying every moment of it.